I can finally finally finally tell you this. I know this isn't related to the stuff I usually post about here but it's huge to me and my life ... really huge.

I'm excited to move on to the next chapter in my life, but scared to death for so many reasons.

  • Will I isolate myself from the world and never leave the house?
  • Will I get insanely fat?
  • Will I miss the store too much and regret this? I do love the store.
  • Will I go stir crazy being home? The last time I tried to stay home I opened the store.
  • What if I don't ever sell anything at a craft show ... then what will I do for part-time income? I cannot get a job at GapKids, I'd never take home a paycheck.
  • Owning my store, and being the storeowner, chief decisionmaker, boss, know-it-all (I think!), merchandiser, etc. is a big part of me and gives me an opportunity to talk to other people and be creative. Will I be able to fill that another way?
  • What if instead of this allowing Jason and I to spend time together he just works more?
  • What if I forget that I'm more than Mom and I get stuck in a rut?
  • Will the kids drive me batty? Will I drive the kids batty?
  • Where will I get awesome clothes for my kids without spending a fortune?
  • Where will I sell Because I'm Me stuff?

I have no doubt that this is the right decision, and really truly I'm ready and happy about it, but I feel a little like I'm jumping off a cliff ... hopefully it'll be a really cool jump, like a hang glider.

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9 Comment

  1. You will not regret a decision like this. Yes you will find people to talk to and no you will not get lost in the Mommy role but putting family first is never a decision you regret. Good luck with everything and I can't wait to see what you do.

  2. you WILL find your way to be yourself in this new phase. i'm newly takes some time, but your creativity will carry you through. love on the people at home and have an outlet(s) for you. if i can do this, ANYONE can!

  3. Take it from someone that knows.
    Once it's over you will love it.
    Every day that passes I am so delighted I can hardly stand it;).

    Yes the things you mentioned are real things to think about, but they're much less smaller than I thought they'd be.

    I did realize that I identified myself as a business owner and that took some working through;), but I'm so much happier being a homeschool mom, being myself, etc.

    Hang in there--just get through this closing and then do something to treat yourself.

  4. I knew this and yet I still sit here at my computer with tears welled up in my eyes.
    I love that store and will miss it dearly. This is a very brave and practical decision and I do believe that you will not regret it.

    PLUS. This means you are now free to hop in a car with 5 kids and come visit me!

  5. I know you won't regret spending this time with your kids since they are only little once. But I'm sure you'll have days of feeling all those things. But the payoff will be so much bigger in the long run.
    I'm sure you can find ways of selling your handmade things - they are beautiful!
    I hope you have a busy few weeks at the shop and then some much needed rest!

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  7. OH MY!!! A huge life change, but I'm sure you will enjoy it so. The kids will look back at it as a wonderful change.
    AND...since I was already planning a trip to the store...I'll bring my mad money stash and take a few extra items off your hands.
    (oh and oops...that deleted comment was me. Hubby was logged in here and I didn't notice until it was published)

  8. Much as I will miss the store, it will be nice to have the entire family together during the day. I'm looking forward to being able to see you every day for more than the morning goodbye and the afternoon passing-of-the-kids...

    I love you!