Or, more aptly, I really, really suck at this blogging business these days.
Honestly, I have very little time to sew right now. At least not enough time to get much completed.
And all three of my computers ran into problems the same week ... one a virus, one the wireless modem died and it started running painfully slowly, and the third the external modem on which all the pictures are kept got sick and pretended to be dead for a while. Virus was removed after a great deal of work from a wonderful repair person, wireless modem cannot be resurrected so that computer is now plugged in, and after giving up on ever seeing my years worth of images, including all pictures of River, the wonderful repair person pulled apart the external hard drive and got it going again. The wonderful repair person is my hero this week.
On a more personal front, I am no longer married. I will never believe this was the right thing for him to do, but it's done and life moves forward.
After getting all the details sorted out and looking at my budget I came to the inescapable conclusion that I needed to find a way to bring more money into the house. Getting a job seemed logical ... until I factored in daycare and afterschool care for 5 kids, taxes, the economy and job market, and my strong concerns about giving up home schooling and being home with the kids - things I have always felt very convicted about ... then getting a job just didn't make a lot of sense.
So the little lightbulb went off and I posted an ad on Craigslist offering in-home child care. And it's going quite well. I'm home with the kids, I'm able to teach them, I'm able to get them to their activities and coordinate with their father for his time with them, they are getting an opportunity to make new friends, I'm enjoying the new personalities blessing our home, and, yes, the money is helping a bit. And it's keeping me pretty busy! All in all, for now this seems to be the best path to take.
I'm spending time trying to find what I want in life, now that my life is so different ... figuring out my goals and desires, and then looking at how to get there. Before, I felt I knew the general plan for my life, I was wife, mother, teacher, etc. I believed we'd watch our children grow up, caring for each other and them, and then spend the rest of our lives together. Suddenly that vision is changed and a large part of what I was, wife, is no more. A large part of what I felt my purpose was is gone and finding a new purpose, meaning to life, isn't that easy, but it's imperative for me to have more focus in life than just getting through the day so I can do it all again tomorrow. So anyway, I'm working on figuring out some goals and purposes and it's good ... exciting even.
Enough about me ... back to sewing and quilting ...
*** Enjoy the random kid pictures ... they're so cute. :)